Official Invitation!

I am starting to read The Master and Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov. I have purchased the Penguin Classics edition, translated by the Pevear/Volokhonsky team. I am officially inviting you to join me in an email discussion group of this book. The book itself is not incredibly long, so I hope to only read and discuss over the course of around 2 months time. If you are interested in reading this book and participating in an email discussion with yours truly and whoever else is interested, shoot me an email by this FRIDAY, March 3rd. Then, of course, go buy the book. :)

into the weekend

Fri: a late night planned with friends
Sat: a possible Johnnie reunion, along with some swing dancing!
Soon: a new look for my blog, and a new title, which are in the works. HT to Sir Robert. :)

but while you're here, feel free to feed the resident blog pet, mr purple llamameister, and comment on what philosophers you enjoy reading most.

because everyone needs a purple llama

adopt your own virtual pet!

Love and Reason.

"Reason discovered the struggle for existence and the law which demands that everyone who hinders the satisfaction of my desires should be throttled. That is the conclusion of reason. Reason could not discover love for the other, because it's unreasonable..."
-Levin in Anna Karenina

I finally finished reading this novel... after starting it about 8 months ago. It was a good read... but by the end, I felt as though I didn't like Anna very much, and grew tired of her story line. It was Levin who captured my interest. I think War and Peace is better, and I think that Dostoevsky is still better than Tolstoy. :)
Anyone read Anna Karenina? Thoughts?

I'm considering reading a new (to me) Russian author next - The Master and Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov.

my kickin valentines day

v-day 06, originally uploaded by krisde.

all the necessary components:
violent mafia movie
baudelaire
beer
pizza

and my sexy date...

a shade of red

a shade of red, originally uploaded by krisde.

my v-day date...

at least I'm not wearing black.

I've never had a reason to consider Valentine's day a significant or important or even fun holiday. But I do remember two particular Valentine's days as being somewhat memorable... and since I like to reminisce on occasion, I'll share these two memories.

The first was when I was in eighth grade. A friend and I decided that we wanted to do a "random act of kindness" for our friends and classmates. So we stayed up one weeknight and made homemade valentines using construction paper, doilies, stickers, glitter, and markers... they might not have been very pretty, but we made over 100... then we put one in each locker at school, in a spirit of anonymity and goodwill. I daresay I spotted a few strewn on the floor and stepped on, but it was fun to see the perplexity/surprise/smiles on people's faces for finding an anonymous valentine in their locker.

The second was when I was a senior at St. John's. My friend Lisa and I had no plans or date or anything for Valentine's day. But our friend Anton was kind enough to take us both out to dinner, for sushi. It was a memorable evening. We were probably the only people who requested a table for three instead of two at the restaurant, and I know that Anton could have just taken Lisa, but nevertheless I was included in their dinner out and had a great time.

Alright, enough stories.

My tirimisu was a success last weekend when I hosted a cooking club gathering. Photos hopefully to come soon...

btw: incase anyone is that curious, I do have plans tonight for V-day... I'm watching a "violent, unromanticized drama," reading Baudelaire and Bukowski aloud, drinking beer, and having a photo shoot... my date?? Just about one of the coolest people I know... I might even make sushi for her.

generation why

I had a very nice dinner at Natasha's Cafe last night - a Midnight Chicken Curry wrap with mashed potatoes and a greek salad. Wow, good stuff. I also had some great conversation with my friend Carla.

Carla and I were discussing at length a topic that inevitably seems to roll around at some point whenever we get together (and this usually is once every 4 or 5 months). Namely, what is going on with my generation? This applies specifically to the earlier Generation Y but I think could also affect some later Generation X-ers. She has witnessed a type of crisis among us: we don't pursue set goals, we don't even make goals, and instead of plugging into a job or career, we float and wander and oftentimes don't even support ourselves on our own. Why are there so many young people searching for meaning? Why are so many of our generation hanging around bars out of this lack of meaning? Why do we often act out of desperation or resignation rather than purpose and resolution? Specifically, my friend wanted to know what her generation did to us, their kids, in making us this way.

Some interesting observations: we have been raised in an American culture that saw the longest stretch of prosperity and peace in its entire history. We also have been raised in a culture that focused on increasing our self-esteem. We have been enticed with the magnitude of opportunity, but the choices we faced may have been no different from those of our parents. We have been individualistic. College was expected. Now, graduate school is nearly requisite for a good job. Living in a time and culture of plenty, we are naturally spoiled.

Do we expect the world to hand us our paycheck on a silver platter? Do we expect easy living? Do we have an ingrown pretentiousness and cynicism that disdains lower paying jobs, corporate loyalty, and doing what appears to be "settling" for something that appears less than the best? In other words, are we living in an unreality? Are we deluding ourselves that we can attain our idealistic notions of finding gainful AND interesting employment, that is stimulating, rewarding, refreshing, and perhaps even profitable... or do we need to just suck it up and face reality that you better just dig in your heels and work your way up as best you can somewhere no matter what the content of your job is as the only way to make progress or a decent living in this society?

I have been pressured and/or encouraged to pursue a profitable profession. Orthodontics was what my family always encouraged me to go after, as a way to make not just a good living, but a luxurious living... When I contested that I didn't want to be an orthodontist, or perhaps even didn’t want wealth, my attitude was incomprehensible to my parents. Perhaps they thought I was being silly. Perhaps enjoyable work was too much to ask; if you had respectful work, that was enough, or a nice paycheck? Even better. But they were working through the 80s, marked by the yuppies, the young upwardly mobile. These young urban professionals had this mentality of climbing the corporate ladder. I think we’ve moved away from this demographic in the current generation of the work force.

I believe it has something to do with a crisis of identity. Though traditionally, this crisis of identity would usually have taken place around ages 16-18, now it seems to be prolonged a decade later. For example, it is more common for young people to wait longer to get married and put off having kids until their 30s. On the one hand, this is not my experience with my immediate sphere of friendships. I see people tying the knot as soon as they finish college, and starting to have children before they are even 25. But I also realize that my closest sphere of friends are not representative of my generation as a whole, and I would agree that my experience is an anomaly rather than the norm. Even in my church, all of the young, first time mothers (or mothers-to-be) I see are all above 25. Most are in the 27-30 range. I have numerous single friends as well who are in their upper twenties and early 30s. Having children when you’re 40 is not seen as unusual through the eyes of my generation and the later Gen X-ers. Many don’t feel a rush to get married or start families; they see that as giving up what would be an otherwise vibrant decade of their 20s.

I think there is intense pressure to find your identity, to fulfill your destiny (to put it in a secular turn of phrase), and, honestly, “to be all that you can be.” Perhaps corporate loyalty is seen as falling short of this mark, or as an empty, dim prospect… certainly I’ve had my bouts with corporate America and a lack of fulfillment swimming in the waters of my vocational confusion… but is that reality? Furthermore, why all the vocational confusion and reluctance?

I vacillate between saying that this generation’s identity is rooted in fierce independence or parasitic dependence… Perhaps we want the image of independence, but often this is a farce... We all too often depend on parents, community, society to help us along. We think a few letters after our name will guarantee a more fulfilling future that will cater to our needs, and give us a life of leisure. We aren’t thinking of retirement. We’re thinking of living a life of leisure here and now… we’re wondering why the hell would we sell out to corporate America, business, or commercialism? Why give up our (perceived) freedom?

If these are honest representations of questions facing myself and others in my generation, they risk sounding arrogant, idealistic, and disdainful on the ears of those who are sloughing away for their retirement, committing themselves to work par excellence, from the mundane to the challenging, like my friend Carla. We may have lost the perspective that freedom, peace, prosperity are all tenuous realities that could be snapped at any moment. We think they are assured, and deserved, for our intelligence, our degrees, our culture, our Americanism. That, I think, is dead pan wrong. Frankly, even if we are intelligent, it has only made us shrewd and lazy lacking any real work ethic… seeking a way to avoid the toil, avoid the work, for carefree whimsy and adventure. (I can distinctly remember a similar attitude among peers in high school, who boasted they could not only not study, but also stay high on drugs, and yet still pull off a better grade than someone like myself, who study as I might, never pulled off an "A" in AP Calculus. My question remains: why is that something to boast about?)

So where does the fault lie, for this attitude, this crisis? Ourselves? Our parents? Our culture? Our nationality? Our society? Our fallen nature? I’m more tempted to say choice G: all of the above, but I honestly don’t know.

I think this, our cynical view of work and vocation, has been shaped by a serious disconnection.
We are disconnected from the work of our hands.
We are disconnected from our Creator and hearing His call.

Perhaps I’ll explore these in a later post. For now I think I’ve rambled enough.

frozen smoothies.

I'm finding out the wonder and convenience of frozen smoothies. I was already making smoothies on occasion, but sometimes it is inconvenient to do so in the early morning... it's noisy and might wake my roommates, and most mornings, I'm running late because I delayed getting out of bed. I experimented the other day with making a smoothie in the evening, and then popping it in the freezer overnight. I must say, wow! It is just as good, if not better. Then I stretch breakfast out over the course of my entire morning, which has to be good in terms of keeping my metabolism up. It also shaves 15 minutes out of my morning stuff-to-do. This morning's concoction: peach, banana, strawberry. Yum.

Last night, I cooked homemade baked mac n cheese... mmmm... it's my absolute favorite. So apparently I'm moving up in the world... while, apparently, none of my friends cook either. (No feedback on recipe/food suggestions) :P Saturday I am hosting the aforementioned cooking club. It is an Italian themed dinner, and I am tackling tiramisu. Yikes!

Tonight, I am going out to eat at a local restaurant, Natasha's Cafe, which appears to be a quirky mix of Mediterranean and Eastern European fare. Their specialty is Turkish coffee. Mmm.

I was commenting on the fact that for such light fare on a blog post, I should then turn to something serious, like Iran and the nuclear threat... but when it comes down to it, I just don't have much to say about it. So it goes.

YAY!

15 minutes later, I made my computer regurgitate the CD. With the help of tape, a letter opener, and after a quick prayer, my CD has been recovered! Yipee.

The highlight of my day, no doubt.

argh.

My computer ate a photo CD.

It was there, and now it's gone. Swallowed up in the abyss of technology.

Frushi

Frushi, originally uploaded by krisde.

one such random food pic...

Frushi, a new take on traditional Sushi with fruit and coconut instead of fish and veggies... prepared at my last cooking club meeting by Karen & Chad. :)

food.

I've noticed this trend among a lot of people my age. We get out of college, out of dorm life, cease our reliance on a cafeteria, and we actually start supporting ourselves in a decent way and don't need to live off of Ramen, but we still don't have the motivation, desire, or know-how to cook decently for ourselves. One friend relies on frozen dinners for every meal. Another friend would be happy if nutrition came in pill form so she wouldn't have to bother with food and food preparation. Now, I loathe grocery shopping (as aforementioned). Nevertheless, I also can really appreciate a good meal... and I think we should enjoy good food (and yes, good beer, good wine, good cigars, too ;) I think food is one of those things we can be grateful for. Upon reflection, we could have been designed to get nutrition from a pill... but this would eliminate the need for taste buds, in fact, something quite needless, but something quite gratifying. To have a cold beer after a stressful day, or a glass of sweet tea on a humid day... it's pleasurable, and I am filled with amazement that God would give us such "needless" gifts so that we can have pleasure and enjoyment and refreshment and good things in abundance. Etc. I'm on the verge of being trite. But I'll continue anyway...

I want to appreciate food, just as I would appreciate wine or good conversation or sleep or a hug or poetry...

I just don't have a lot of motivation to plan and prep when I just cook for lone me. I have heard this from other friends as well... when you cook for yourself, well, what's the point in preparing a big meal? Yea, you get leftovers, but it's a lot of work. And sometimes that work doesn't seem worthwhile.

I have recently been involved in a cooking club, as you may have noticed lots of random food photos gathering on my flickr site. This has been a great way to have fellowship, fun, and yet also have an excuse to cook something fancy that requires more effort than I usually would make for a meal, not to mention, learning new recipes and eating good food other people have prepared. (I'm tackling tiramisu for our next gathering.) I find the group has been a fairly smashing success. However, it hasn't quite inspired me enough to implement more complex dishes into my daily diet.

My daily diet, thus, revolves around things that are quick and easy and don't require a lot of thinking or planning ahead... things like cereal, pasta, omelettes, smoothies, and PB&J. I would like to find ways to make good, even hearty meals, that would be fairly simple and not time consuming. Some friends tell me I should invest in a crockpot, which can do wonders to make good meals easily... but I don't have a crockpot and don't feel like buying one at this stage in my life. OK... so what am I going to do? I've been searching for some good recipes online... I'm finding a few things here and there, but heck, if anyone has a good recipe to share, I'd love to hear it. You can comment or email me. :)

TGIF!

my never ending crusade.

Got this in an email from the local blood center:

Did You Know?

• 95% of all people will need blood products in their lifetime.

• Less than 5% of the eligible donors donate.

• One whole blood donation can be used to save up to 3 lives.


Moral of the story: give blood! :) Because you want to be just as cool as me.

until the world caves in.

There is a button on the microwave that reads "Diet Cook." I have no idea what to make of it. You push it and it doesn't tell you how long it's cooking your food, or at what power... so what the heck does it do? Is this button supposed to decrease the calories in my food? Uhhh.... I think not.

This will be a stressful morning today. Trying to squeeze 15 people in a conference room that only holds 10... yea, I'm the fall guy for this goof-up.

I need a vacation from life.

Is this what they call freedom?
Is this what you call pain?
Is this what they call discontented fame?

You push until you're shoving,
You bend until you break,
Do you stand on the broken fields where your fathers lay?

It'll be a day like this one,
When the world caves in
When the world caves in
When the world caves in

There's nothing here worth saving,
There's no one here at all,
Is there any net left, that could break our fall?

It'll be a day like this one,
When the sky falls down,
And the hungry and poor and deserted are found

Are you discontented?
Have you been pushing hard?
Have you been throwing down, this broken house of cards?

It'll be a day like this one,
When the world caves in,
When the world caves in,

Is there nothing left now?
Nothing left to sing?
Are there any left now, who haven't kissed the enemy?

Is this the new year, or just another desperation?

Does justice ever find you?
Do the wicked never lose?
Is there any other song, to sing beside these blues?

And nothing is okay,
Till' the world caves in,

Until the world caves in,
Until the world caves in...

-The Blues, Switchfoot