I have been blogging since late 2002. Going into 2003, I created new year's resolutions that fell into the categories of "spiritual," "physical, "mental," and "social," categorizations loosely based off of Luke 2:52. Going into 2004, I had narrowed resolutions down to two items, both "spiritual" in nature. Going into 2005, I basically scrapped resolutions altogether, commenting that "New Years are not particularly significant to me... nothing really changes for me..."
Here are my further musings about going into 2005:
"Sometimes I look forward to the "new year" because of some pending event that I approach with great anticipation. Perhaps it used to be a vacation with family, high school graduation, going to college, going back to college, going to Europe, college graduation, going to Alaska... but as I look at 2005, there is only one thing to look forward to (in the sense of actual events) - and that would be: weddings. I have 3 weddings already scheduled to attend (one each in April, May, June) (and in 3 different states nonetheless: Kentucky, Florida, New York). So I can look forward to those. But as for my personal life, well, just me and Alyosha and an apartment and anticipation only of what God may have in store, because I have nothing myself in store."
So now, in retrospect, I can say it was really 5 weddings, not 3, that I attended in 2005; 2 weddings I helped photograph; 2 friends got engaged; 4 friends had babies; 3 friends got pregnant.
As for some other numbers for myself:
1 move
1 job change
1 trip by car
5 trips by plane
16 visitors to KY
356 + 81 photos uploaded to flickr (2 sites)
2 blog appearance changes
110 blog posts
I guess God had a lot in store for me, the biggest surprise consisting of my recent trip to Belarus over Thanksgiving.
So, will I reinstate resolutions for 2006, you may ask. No, not really. If I have any resolution, it is for my life to be employed in something else, elsewhere, by year's end. Of course, there are always those same things that go around and come around again: "exercise more," "read more," "tailgate less," "travel more," "take more adventures," ...
But when it comes down to it, I'm okay with having less or doing less, if having less is for the sake of having more focus. I have been reading this excellent book The Call by Os Guinness. (I highly recommend it.) The most recent chapter was aptly titled "A Focused Life." Let me include a few excellent quotes:
"The modern world offers an endless range of choice and change, overwhelming traditional simplicities and cohesion...
Life has become a smorgasbord with an endless array of dishes. And more important still, choice is no longer just a state of mind. Choice has become a value, a priority, a right. To be modern is to be addicted to choice and change. These are the unquestioned essence of modern life. Some of the effects of pluralization are devastating but subtle. For example, the increase in choice and change leads to a decrease in commitment and continuity- to everyone and everything. Thus obligation melts into option and givenness into choice. But other effects are terribly obvious-above all the way in which choice and change lead quickly to a sense of fragmentation, saturation, and overload...
The result is not only overload but also a profound loss of unity, solidity, and coherence in life...
In 1941 T.S. Eliot wrote: "Can a lifetime represent a single motive?" If the single motive is our own, the answer to Eliot must be no. We are not wise enough, pure enough, or strong enough to aim and sustain such a single motive over a lifetime. That way lies fanaticism and failure. But if the single motive is the master motivation of God's calling, the answer is yes. In any and all situations, God's call to us is the unchanging and ultimate whence, what, why, and whither of our lives. Calling is a "yes" to God that carries a "no" to the chaos of modern demands..."
This is my desire. A solid, unfragmented, focused life. Sure, there are books I want to read, places I want to travel, people I want to visit, more friends I would like to make, more first-time experiences I would like to have... but ultimately, what I most want for 2006 is a focused life on the One worth focusing on, who never bores me, is never predictable, is not always safe, but nevertheless is always good.
2 comments:
re: the safe thing, thanks to Mr Lewis and his Christ-like lion.
Yes, our souls are secure. And yes, everything is a loss, etc etc, a la Philippians 3:8. But that doesn't mean we're "safe" from other cares and tribulations and sickness. A la Romans Chapter 8. God is not a pansy to make life harmless and easy and silver plated once we follow Him. Because otherwise that would make earth into heaven, when it is heaven that will invade earth... Safe is not the same as trustworthy or faithful or good, either. God not being safe is not about him not being our refuge; He is. I think it has more to do, at least in my mind, that following God is risky business. He'll ask things of you that you didn't expect or think you couldn't handle, and that you might not be able to handle apart from Him. He'll do the unexpected. He's not safe, and for me, that means He's unpredictable and will stretch us to be more like Christ... Developing Christlikeness is tough, not safe. Following God doesn't make everything go your way.
re: time. Yes, hard to believe you've been reading my blog over a year, harder to believe that I left SJC almost 2 years ago, and even harder to believe that I started blogging almost 4 years ago..! thanks for hanging around and commenting, even when I almost always want to throw the towel in ;)
Mojo's got this song he wrote on my new Supertones album--it's called "I Will Follow," about how Jesus saved his life from adolescent drug-using stupidity. In the album's liner notes, he explains about it, "Salvation is a gift that costs us everything. Not that we buy it, Christ did that, but because you must relinquish what you hold dear in order to receive it." His old friends thought he was an idiot and a loser for giving his life to Jesus, and he caught a lot of flak for it. Jesus wasn't safe to follow, not if he wanted to keep his friends, but He was good to follow.
I think one of the things I like most about the 'Tones is what you were talkin' about, the focus thing. They're focused on Jesus Christ, a lot more so than even some Christian bands, and they've got a good message in a world that's selling feel-good messages. Jesus has got a message of salvation for the world, and it's not cheap--it takes bloodshed, and nobody wants to hear that there's something wrong with them--but the 'Tones are all about that.
Well, were all about that, anyway. I think ska is dead again. But on the other hand, isn't Jesus all about resurrection? I bet there will be ska in heaven. If not sooner.
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