one of those songs that seemed like it was written for me, right now.

January 1, I’ve got a lot of things on my mind
I’m looking at my body through a new spy satellite
Try to lift a finger, but I don’t think I can make the call
So tell me if I move, ‘cause I don’t feel anything at all

So carry me
I’m just a dead man
Lying on the carpet
Can’t find a heartbeat
Make me breathe
I want to be a new man
Tired of the old one
Out with the old plan

I woke up from a dream about an empty funeral
But it was better than the party full of people I didn’t really know
They’ve got hearts to break and burn
Dirty hands to feel the earth
There’s something in my veins
But I can’t seem to make it work…won’t work

So carry me
I’m just a dead man
Lying on the carpet
Can’t find a heartbeat
Make me breathe
I want to be a new man
Tired of the old one
Out with the old plan

Can you find a beat inside of me?
Any pulse?
Getting worse?
Any pulse?
Getting worse?
Inside of me, can you find a beat?

So carry me
I’m just a dead man
Lying on the carpet
Can’t find a heartbeat
Make me breathe
I want to be a new man
Tired of the old one
Out with the old plan

- Jars Of Clay - Dead Man (Carry Me)
From the album Good Monsters

true geekhood.

Come on everyone.... take the GEEK test!
My results:
27.21893% - Total Geek
+ Geekish Tendencies................................≥09%
++ Geek.............................................≥15%
+++ Total Geek......................................≥25%
++++ Major Geek.....................................≥35%
+++++ Super Geek....................................≥45%
++++++ Extreme Geek.................................≥55%
+++++++ Geek God....................................≥65%
+++++++! Dysfunctional Geek.........................≥75%

I'm sure at least one or two of my friends could get over 65%... ;) Take the test and put your score in the comments.

in honor of hawaiian shirt day at the office....

Bob Slydell: You see, what we're trying to do is get a feeling for how people spend their time at work so if you would, would you walk us through a typical day, for you?
Peter Gibbons: Yeah.
Bob Slydell: Great.
Peter Gibbons: Well, I generally come in at least fifteen minutes late, ah, I use the side door - that way Lumbergh can't see me, heh - after that I sorta space out for an hour.
Bob Porter: Da-uh? Space out?
Peter Gibbons: Yeah, I just stare at my desk, but it looks like I'm working. I do that for probably another hour after lunch too, I'd say in a given week I probably only do about fifteen minutes of real, actual, work.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bob Slydell: I'd like to move us right to Peter Gibbons. We had a chance to meet this young man, and boy that's just a straight shooter with upper management written all over him.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ironies abound.

I'm definitely watching Office Space sometime in the near future...

the deed is done.

I've handed in my 2 weeks notice at my employer. I will be leaving shortly... depending on their needs, my last day will be either July 28th or August 2nd.

Three cheers for the end of a vocationally long 14 months, the beginning of a new phase, and freedom (in many of its forms).

"It is for freedom that Christ has set you free..." - Galatians 5:1

God is good! Support raising continues... a struggle though it may be.

Until next time, as they say in Russian, "Paka!"

2447

I was the 2447 person to finish the Bluegrass 10K. I tied with a 10 year old girl. That makes you feel good, doesn't it? ::cough, cough::

I will say this: I achieved my goal! I was not aiming for speed or running against the clock... I was aiming for endurance and running against myself. It was kind of a solitary affair, which is ironic, considering I was surrounded by roughly 3,200 other people. But I drove myself to the race, leaving a quiet, sleepy house behind. I arrived and walked to the starting line by myself. I don't think I said a single word to anyone for at least 2 hours. The whole race, I was by myself. I saw 1 person I knew: my friend Rachel was calling out times at the 2nd mile marker. I caught her eye and waved, but ran on. I didn't stop to walk once. I kept a very slow pace for running. I was overly cautious in the first mile and it took me over 14 minutes. My average pace was around 12.5 minutes overall. I think miles 3 and 4 were the worst: a lot of uphill running, and for the first time, I experienced leg muscle fatigue. Usually it's just the breathing that takes me out... this time, breathing was ok, but the muscles were starting to get to me. They kindly kept fairly silent until the second day after the race, and then they started screaming at me. I am incredibly glad that I did it, and hope I'll be able to participate in a slightly shorter Midsummer Night's Run.

Then it was sort of anticlimactic. You finish, surrounded by people, but you crossed the finish line on your own. No friends or fellow running friends to greet or high five. So I got a banana, an orange, some water, and sat on a grassy knoll outside the courthouse downtown, and stretched. After 15 minutes, I got up, got in my car, and drove home. That was that.

However, props to my roommate Jessica who made a sign cheering me on and drove downtown to show it off... only problem: neither of us saw the other. I didn't find out until I got home, but she's an awesome friend to be so thoughtful and such an encouragement!

weird associations.

As I was driving to and from the wedding in MI last weekend, I passed this ginormous church with an even more ginormous statue out front:



I was not a particular fan of this statue. I'm still trying to figure out why - maybe it's my latent frustration and/or weakness in not being able to understand the motive or purpose for this, or judging the stewardship of their resources as poor or unwise. And maybe I need to get over that. Or maybe it's just because it reminded me of this statue:



Somehow, imagining Christ as a buried giant in mid scream is a bit disconcerting... and yet I believe there are more similarities here than we realize, if we just think of Christ at a different point in his life... but obviously the former statue is much more appealing to the masses, since after all, Christianity and religion is meant to comfort and not confront...

photos soon

Wedding was superb: beautiful and fun. Photos to follow...

You know what else was superb?? Nick Garklavs giving me 4 cds of mixed retro/80s music. My drive home from MI had spectacular accompaniment... Thanks, bearded mountain man! ;) or lumber jack man... or colonial man.... or... :) This 80s dance party is going to HAPPEN in a happenin' way.

"That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
-2 Corinthians 12:10